Dear Diary . . . day by day

Sunday, June 17th, 2001 - Good Influence

Tim just left. I hate this part of our relationship - this leaving part that goes with the long-distance thing. Grr. He lives much too far away. I never want him to go (or to leave his house) when the time comes on Sunday nights.
We had an absolutely lovely day today. We slept in late, despite the fact that someone called my house at 10am (never call before noon on a weekend - just don't do it!) and my landlady decided to weedwhack the backyard (right behind my window) at 11am. It was deliciously lazy, lingering in bed beside my lover, getting kisses on my shoulder or arms around my waist as I tossed and turned. Turned like a corndog, Tim said. Heh. And I wonder why I've been craving corndogs recently.
We made a HUGE breakfast of scrambled eggs, strawberry pancakes and chicken apple sausage (that last for Tim). My pancakes turned out delicious, which was nice as the first time I tried cooking for Tim I attempted strawberry pancakes and they turned out goopy in the middle with little bits of frozen strawberry. Today I used fresh strawberries and topped them with whipped cream (which melted right away, but still tasted yummy). And I even, gulp, ate a few very small bites of chicken apple sausage that Tim peeled for me. That's love, y'all. It's been over a decade since I voluntarily ate chicken meat; I'm trying to convince myself that chicken isn't so different from fish. I hate the thought of my eating habits being so very different from Tim's. I draw the line at mammals, though; I'm never eating beef or pork or any of that stuff ever again.
Anyway, after digesting I made some edits on a query letter I've been meaning to write since last summer and sent it off, thanks to Tim's influence. I told him he could nag me until I did it, and he did - nice and gently. Yay, that's done! Tim is such a good influence on me in so many, many ways.
We walked over the hill to Piedmont Ave where we sat in Gaylord's Coffee Shop and had frozen lattes (amazingly yummy) and worked on stuff. Tim had given me an idea for a speculative poem so I sat down to write it. Six pages later I was despairing over something that was much too long to be a poem. I just get wordy. (This is the problem with all my short fiction lately: the stories all want to be novels.) Anyway, when I sat down and read it to Tim, his response was wonderful. He told me he really liked it (and I believe him; he wouldn't say he liked something if he didn't) and told me that it was a very short, concise story, not a poem. At first I was dissappointed by the news that I had yet again failed in my attempt to write a speculative poem. But then I realized: I wrote a story! Hell yeah! And it's not my usual gods-this-needs-such-major-edits-let's-shove-it-away-for-a-long-time story. No. This really is only a spit shine away from submitting to F&SF. Hot damn.
We had a celebratory dinner at Cato's Ale House, where I was thwarted in my quest for salmon but had a nice time regardless. Then back home. Tim tried to get me to come home with him while I tried to get him to stay. Then it was time for him to go home. Sigh.
I'm really in love with the boy, y'know? I can't help myself. And it just feels so fucking good to be happy, truly happy, almost all the time. I keep saying this and you'll hear it again until your eyes natually skim over this part of my journal entries, but: I'm a very blessed and lucky girl. I have the best boyfriend in the world.

Exercise log:
Tim would like me to note that he made up for the other night. I wouldn't say that. I would say I got fucked to within an inch of my life. I love me some 24-year-old lovin'.
Writing log:
I wrote a poem that turned into a really neat, compact story titled "The Janitor's Night Dive". And I think the language is prettier than my other prose because I was trying to write a poem. Too bad I didn't write this a month ago; it's perfect for MA's anthology.
I'm currently reading:
Stranger Things Happen by Kelly Link
My new PO Box is:
Heather Shaw
P.O. Box 13222
Berkeley, CA 94712-4222

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