Dear Diary . . . day by day

Wednesday, May 16th, 2001 - A Spider's Kiss

Hey, M'ris, I have what I thought was a spider bite, too. It was this awful, swollen red bump right on the cheekbone near the corner of my eye. On Monday it was so swollen and shiny it made it look like someone had hit me with their fist. By now it sorta looks like an ill-colored beauty mark. It really brings out my cheekbones, I swear.
Anyway, I had the doctor look at it (I was hoping it was the cause of all my worries, although I would be loathe to kill all the spiders in my room; they do take care of all those nasty, buzzing, flying insects that like to dive bomb me while I'm trying to fall asleep) and she told me, no, no spider bite. Just a zit. But whatta great zit! I'm no longer afraid of having acne. A big zit on my face doesn't bother me so much. I know it will be gone soon enough, that this is just the outward indication that I'm going to bleed soon. It helps that I have no special people around or events to attend in the next week or so. Hmm. Yeah, as long as the zit is gone by Wiscon, which is the next big thing I'm doing, then I'll be fine.
I am excited about Wiscon, by the way. Potlatch was so much fun, and that was a tiny con of only one day. Wiscon is a four-day feminist science fiction convention. I'll get to stay in a hotel room and everything! Not only will I have tons of like-minded people to hang out and talk to, but some of my favorite writers will be there (including Nalo Hopkinson). Hm, I should be writing stuff, so I don't feel like a poser while I'm there.
I was going to write this entry about how moody I get right before my period. And how this one is especially bad. I feel like a water balloon filling with water and sagging towards a very sharp stick. I can hardly wait to pop, I'm so uncomfortable in my skin these days. And, well, a part of me is hoping that this rash is just related to an especially bad bout of PMS. A girl can hope, can't she?
Last night, during corpse pose in yoga class, I tried to meditate on the rash fading away. I went immediately into a waking dream, where I forgot to think about it. But everytime I came to a bit, I would concentrate on making my body absorb the discoloration on my skin. And you know what? It wasn't gone, but it was noticably lighter when I checked my legs after class. Yay, biofeedback!
Anyway, I'll try to keep updating here, despite my moodiness this week. I hope none of y'all take it too personally. This is really between me and my estrogen.

Exercise log:
A wonderful yoga class in an overhot room that made stretching so easy! I was also much stronger in some of the poses than I thought I would be. I should definitely keep up with the gym.
Writing log:
Working on sketching out a new story. It may or may not be spec fic. We'll see. It's definitely erotic.
I'm currently reading:
Fool's War by Sarah Zettel
On hold for now:
Henry and June by Anais Nin

My new PO Box is:
Heather Shaw
P.O. Box 13222
Berkeley, CA 94712-4222

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