Dear Diary . . . day by day

Sunday, May 20th, 2001 - Extended Family

Yesterday was a very social, very fun day - all in Hayward, of all places.
I BARTed down around noon to have lunch with Marissa. I've hung out with her in small groups before, but this was the first time we got to sit down and have real girltalk. And it was great fun. I felt instantly comfortable talking to her, and we talked about everything from boys to body image to PMS to sex to . . . well, you know, real girl talk. I haven't had that in awhile, and I was very pleased to discover someone like M'ris that I can talk to like that. Very fun.
After lunch, I BARTed to the other Hayward BART station, where I walked over to Kaaron's house (Kaaron = Karen and Aaron). They moved in months and months ago, but this was the first time I managed to make it down to see their house. I joked that I was waiting for them to get settled, and it certainly looks like they have! I loved their house - very cluttered in a nick-knacky, comforting way, with mirrors and shelves and pictures all over the walls, and stuff on all the shelves and a clawfoot bathtub painted to look like the ocean (with fish!) and plants everywhere! I want my house to look that cozy - like a little comfy cottage with a garden and two cats and pillows and plants . . . Ahhh.
Ian and Elle and Leo came down with their neighbor, Elpha, whom I've met before at a party. We admired the garden, sat around and talked and someone went grocery shopping for the barbeque. It was a kind of informal party, with people milling about, helping to prepare food or stopping to play with Leo (who is a very busy baby! I kept wanting to hold him and he's just too wiggly for that). We had grilled portobella mushrooms (YUM!) and eggplant and others had chicken shiskabobs too. Lots of yummy food.
Later, we melted ghiradelli chocolate and dipped fresh cherries and strawberries in it while we sat outside. The sun was already down, but it was still warm enough to sit outdoors, which was nice. We got into a big conversation about sex, dominated by us four women. We talked about sex ed in schools, and about which sex scenes in which books were the most informative in showing us how it really is. The winner for most helpful book was Valley of the Horses by Jean Auel, in case you're curious. This is despite the fact that we can now all laugh uproariously about Jondalar's "exceptionally large tool" and how Ayla was the first to "take him all in". The boys just faded away while we all quoted the line, "And Jondalar pushed and he didn't find her barrier!" It was neat to hear how important such books were to all these other women (Judy Blume's Forever got runner up), and it made me sad for Marissa's friend who is trying to keep such books from her kids.
The concrete we were sitting on got to be too much, and we went back into the cozy living room, where we threw squid beanie babies around and tormented one another with octopus puppets (Karen is a elementary school teacher and soon-to-be-former nanny, so she has all sorts of WAY COOL toys and stuff in her house.) Elle asked for lullaby for Leo, who was finally winding down, and after Ian's sea chanty I came up with something way too upbeat and fast-paced ("People of the Earth Tribe Rise"), which didn't soothe Leo, but was enjoyed by Aaron and some of the older folk. I'll have to teach it to everyone at a more appropriate time.
As we were all drifting out to go home, Leo was left to snooze on the floor while things were gathered. At one point, it was just me and Leo in the room, and he woke up, rolled over, and started to cry. Instinctively, I reached down and scooped him up and held him against my body. He curled up against me and fell asleep again, soothed by my closeness, I guess. I looked up and realized I was directly in front of a big mirror. I saw myself, in a long skirt and my green sun hat, holding this sweet blond baby against my chest. We were very cute. In fact, as people trickled through, one by one, they each stopped and looked at us and said, "Oh, now that's cute.", which was pleasing. Elle smiled at me and said, "Enjoy it, because most of the time they're not that quiet and sweet." Oh. I was definitely enjoying it. At that moment I was forgetting all my anxiety about babies and was listening to my womb screaming at me: "I want one! I want a blond, blue-eyed baby just like Leo!"
Oh, don't worry. I intend to go on ignoring that womb voice for another 5 years, at least.
Kaaron gave me a ride home, as Scrappy (Ian's VW Thing/car) was full up and it was almost too late to walk to and from BART. It was nice, chatting with just the two of them on the way home. I should definitely hang out with people more. The day was full of warmth from new friends and old friends, and I went in through my honeysuckle arch thinking to myself what a lucky, rich and happy person I am right now.

Exercise log:
Oh, walking here and there and holding Leo, which took some arm strength, let me tell you.
Writing log:

I'm currently reading:
Fool's War by Sarah Zettel
On hold for now:
Henry and June by Anais Nin

My new PO Box is:
Heather Shaw
P.O. Box 13222
Berkeley, CA 94712-4222

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