Mail is welcome.
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First of all, you're right David. The counter on this page takes WAY too
long to load...so say goodbye to the counter for now! I might stick it
somewhere else, or I may put it up from time to time to see how many hits
I'm getting, but for the most part, I no longer care as much. I think I
have about 20 regular readers, which, when I think about it too much, is a
little intimidating. And encouraging, of course. I had a doctor's appointment this morning - Planned Parenthood. When the doc asked me why I moved from Indiana I told her - Indiana. Not the weather, but the people (excluding all those I dearly love and miss who still live there). I told her about Planned Parenthood of Franklin Indiana where they told me, "If you keep acting like such a slut, you're going to find Mr. Right and he's not going to think you're Ms. Right becasue of your past." She was properly horrified. It's an ISSUE with me right now, my sexuality. I am really enjoying my lifestyle; I'm enjoying having more than one boyfriend, enjoying being not ashamed of liking sex, etc. However, there was incident this weekend where I felt this openness was taken for granted - that it was assumed I was "always willing" and my schedule and feelings could be shoved around to accommodate another's desire to have sex with me, and it really, really pissed me off. I know the person in question probably didn't mean to make me feel this way, but there was a definite lack of respect behind the events. I did speak to this person and hopefully cleared things up, but it made me feel ... it made me feel like I was back in Indiana, where a woman with a healthy, roaring sex drive is considered a disposable slut. Just a hole to use. I know, I'm overreacting, but it's somehting that I so value about being out here - being open about liking this stuff and still being respected. It kinda tripped me out that these feelings were suddenly back. Sunday night, Jodi was commenting on my shimmy (which I finally got - it's a belly dancing move where you move your hips back and forth very fast. It's something that doesn't come naturally, so when I finally got it during Burning Man I was psyched). She asked me if it improved my performance during sex. I answered by pulling one leg up over my shoulder, "Honey, my entire dance training has improved my sex life ....". she grinned at me and whispered, "You're just a sex kitten, aren't you?". I had to smile at that (I rather like that description, actually) and said, "Shhhh! Nobody knows!", at which we both laughed uproarously at the thought. As I said, I like being open about being sexual; it's fun to feign coyness, too. Hm, a word on all of this. I want to make it clear that I'm not indiscriminate - that is, it takes me quite a while to approve and decide to take on a new lover. It is not something I take lightly at all. Now, once approved, I am usually very open and, um, extremely affectionate with my lovers. It's just not easy to gain that approval. I bet mom is wishing I'd just stop talking about all this and write that children's book for god's sake, so she'd have something to tell people about. Sorry, Mom, not today. Although your suggestion *has* made me start thinking about a story for young teens - about coming of age and the lack of sex information we give our kids. I have some characters loosely sketched. So, there. I know it's not the sunshine and duckies adolescent problem book you wanted, but it's a topic I think I could write honestly. | ||
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