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Last night was just weird. Good-weird, not bad-weird, but very, very odd
nonetheless. It started out with David agreeing to have me stop by for a
bit between yoga and Buffy. Not that that doesn't happen from time to
time, but lately he's been all "I need my space from people" so I was
surprised to gain an audience mid-week and for no good reason. It helps that we had a specific topic that turned into the main thrust of my visit: scuba diving. David has been diving for years, and is leaving this weekend on his family's annual dive vacation (usually somewhere absolutely gorgeous and posh in the Carribean . . . sigh). I've been fascinated by his stories and descriptions of diving, but haven't had the extra dough to shell out for the certification class that is necessary to even begin diving. But now, I have an "in". Corn Man and Rebecca's friend, Rob, is a certified instructor and has offered us all free classes (it helps that Corn's mom, Mimi, has a pool for the initial classes). Yes, I'll be renting equipment and getting a mask with my prescription ground into it and spending money on stuff like that, but I've got that new credit card, remember? Anyhow, I'm so excited about finally learning to do this I keep pestering David with questions. Luckily, it's something he loves talking about (and is excited himself by the fact that he's going to be doing it again very soon). David even suggested that we could take a trip with dive folk down to Monterey - which is where I'll be doing my open water training anyway. Anyhow, it'll be nice to share a new hobby with David, as it's something we haven't learned to fight about yet (and hopefully never will). We're both enthusiastic about it and we spent most of our visit last night poring over his equipment (ooh, so much equipment!) and talking about diving. Very fun. Then I ran home to Buffy, which was EXCELLENT! So fitting that it was about repressed sexual energy, as my mood has been swinging that way lately (ahem). Then I saw Faith was going to be on Angel, so I settled in to watch, grumbling quietly about the sneaky way they got me to watch that show (I loved, loved, loved the scene where Faith is dancing with another woman's man and ends up dancing and fighting at the same time; she's so . . . bad-girl, so sexy in that way). Anyhow, as it happens every Tuesday when I try to sit down and watch Angel, the phone rang. Hardly anyone calls me, people, and even though I answer phones for 4 hours each day, I get excited when the phone rings at home. Someone wants to talk to *me*! It was Mary Anne, needing to talk about stuff that David wouldn't know about. I don't really want to go into depth here, but I do want to mention that this phone call meant a lot to me. I've been chatting lightly with MA recently, but it was nice to know that she feels she can call me too, when she needs to. I don't know that I was all that helpful, but I tried to be honest, reassuring and listen well. Anyhow, I felt a little off-kilter after that, and even though I settled down to watch the rest of Angel on tape (I had thrown a tape in at the beginning of the conversation), I was restless and couldn't sleep. Too much to think about, I guess, it usually is. Today, well . . . today I feel very much in my body. In my self. I've got a few things coming up that are stressful to me (David leaving soon is one of them; I know it's only for 2 weeks, but I'm gonna miss that boy; he's still my best friend), but for the most part, well . . . I feel independent. Yes, I still long to be loved, held and all that, but it doesn't feel like the only thing in life. At the moment it doesn't feel like that; I've no confidence that this feeling will persist - I'm only 27, after all. Anyhow, it's sorta like being on an internal prozac - I feel the yearnings, but they're buried and are thus easy to ignore. For right now, that's ok. Hell, I should certainly take advantage of this feeling. Maybe I'll go jog/walk really fast. Sweat always helps. So, I ran. I had bike shorts and a T-shirt that fit (as opposed to my oversized ones that hide the butt better); I didn't run at first, but started off at a fast walk. As soon as there were no people around, I jogged for a few blocks. I slowed to a canter to cross the railroad tracks and go down the path into Aquatic park. I walked for a bit in the park, then decided I'd start running when I got to the shady part; it's a hot day today - 80 degrees easy - and I was sweating just walking in the sun. When I hit the shade I ran. I had long, easy strides, I rolled through my feet, I could feel my butt muscles help push me along. It felt grand; I felt as if I was flying! I ran fast like this for awhile until I was startled by sudden movement at my feet: a snake! Brown with red and yellow stripes, he didn't look dangerous at only 18 inches long, but he slithered away every time I took a step near him. He disturbed some bright aqua blue dragonflies, so I watched the dragonflies (one of my favorite creatures) for awhile instead. This was all right by a little creek/stream that runs into the main - lake? - there in the park. By the time I was done lookin' at all of them, it was time to jog back. I never hit that stride again, but that's ok. I walked and jogged back to work, rode up the elevator with my boss who comiserated with me on exercise (he has an 11-yr-old he tries to keep up with). I took a shower. I got dresseed in my work clothes again. I feel great. I'll bet I'll even sleep well tonight (exercise does that). Yay exercise! | ||
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